The Revolutionary New Gravimetric Radon Protection System

So, you are concerned about protecting yourself from Gravimetric Radon in the atmosphere. Then, you came to the right place because this article will show you how to protect yourself and how the protection works.

The first thing you need to do is acquire a lot of aluminum foil. Once you have aquired at least 5kg of aluminum foil, your'e ready.

The next thing you need to do is start turning that aluminum foil into round half-spheres shaped like helmets and big enough to wear as a hat. For each half sphere, you will need to use at least 8 layers of aluminum foil covering each and every spot on it.

Once you are finished with that, you will have up to about 7 helmets. Distribute theese helmets out to your entire family and closest freind(s) and instruct them to wear it at all times. It is absolutely vital that you always wear your hemet when you are sleeping.

The last and final step may be the hardest because it is a lifetime commitment. Each person wearing the protective sheilding helmets needs to scare away all the evil spirites so that the helmets can be the most productive, effective, and durable against Graviometric radiation. This can be achieved by chanting the vesanucaput (vay-san-you-cuh-poot) by performing the Liturgy Of The Twinki. The Liturgy Of The Twinki is performed by placeing 3 twinki's in an equilateral triangle with side lengths of 3 meters. Then, 3 people join together holding hands to transfer spiritual energy in an incenter formation inside the twinki triangle of power equally spaced apart. Then, everyone starts moving about the incenter of the twinki triangle of mysical power, and anouncing "ooglt-boogley" 3 times each rotation.

In summary, Gravimetric Radon in the atmosphere is a serious first world problem! However, hope still prevails of a better tommorow where we are all sheilded from Gravimetric Radon. The true secrete of how this revolutionary protection system works is this. Gravimetric Radon is not real. This means that the Gravimetric Radon hat works at maximum 100% efficiency all the time, solongas you perform the Liturgy Of The Twinki weekly, because with it, you are exposed to no Gravimetric Radon at all. In conclusion, I hope you have learned a very valuable lesson from this about how to protect you and your family from hidden dangers lurking all around you.